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Basically, an Incubus and a Succubus are male and female of the same race. The stories of legend have been blown way out of proportion from what they really are.
The best way to describe them is a human variant. Like how red hair and blonde hair are variants of traits, an Incubus or Succubus is like a variant of a whole human. They look just like everyone else for the most part, it's the internal physiology that's different. The stories of them having wings and tails and whatnot are untrue. These embellishments are likely due to witnesses being in a state of hypnagogia.
They're a highly secretive race. Their exact origins and how long they've been on Earth is unclear. They've kept themselves hidden for millennia at the very least. There's a few reasons why this is. One major reason is the variation of their physiology.
They can eat and drink regular food just like any other human. If they were to go without, there would be similar consequences like weight loss and dehydration. Where the variation comes in is they consume enzymes, glandular secretions, and blood from humans.
If they didn't eat regular food, but continued to consume "human food", it would keep them alive. Not necessarily happy, but alive. Eating a "properly balanced diet" actually increases their vitality and longevity.
A big reason for their secrecy is because it's not immediately clear why this is so. The only way to find this out would basically be dissection and intense study. Governments, corporations, and other scientists would be all to happy to oblige for one, and two, they probably wouldn't even know what to look for to begin with.
The old legends of Incubi and Succubi are typically sexual in nature, and this is how they get their "food". Enzymes and hormones are in saliva which is obtained from kissing. Sure, you could probably just spit in their mouth or something, but kissing is a lot less degrading.
It's not immediately clear why enzymes are required. What is known is that enzymes are catalysts. It's thought that some kind of chemical reaction takes place within the body that contributes to sustaining life. They already have their own enzymes, but increasing the amount from an outside source would increase the effect.
It's hypothesized that there might be more to the acquisition of saliva than just enzymes themselves. Saliva is notoriously laden with bacteria, even in a clean mouth. It's likely not the bacteria themselves they're after, but the bioelectric energy since bacteria are living things. There's more to it than just electric energy coming from something that's alive, but that's a story for another day.
Testosterone and estrogen are also contained within saliva. Another source is seminal fluid and vaginal secretions. Again, it's unclear why exactly these hormones are required since they won't let anyone study them. It's thought that consuming of hormones from the opposite sex creates a rebalancing effect of their internal hormones.
For example, if an Incubus were to engage with a female, the consuming of the extra estrogen would make the Incubus body produce more testosterone in order to retain a normalized ratio of hormones within. This should in theory make more masculine traits manifest. The opposite would be true for a Succubus. Basically it would make an Incubus more masculine and a Succubus more feminine.
The other thing is blood. It's not what you think. They don't consume blood that comes out of veins or hurt people or animals in any way to obtain it. What they're actually after is the menstrual flow from females. It's not so much as the blood itself, but the composition in its entirety.
There's a few different things in menstrual blood, but the main things they require are stem cells and the hormone melatonin. Stem cells aid in regeneration, but should be broken down and digested like any other cell if consumed, so it's thought they have a way of absorbing them or are somehow "intercepted" on the way to the stomach.
The melatonin has various effects, but mainly increases mental capacity and awareness. This heightened mental acuity gives them an advantage and aids in the "hunting" of humans. That brings us to another reason why they've kept themselves hidden.
In ancient times, they may have been what you could say is a little less discriminate in how they obtained their food. They would tend to come at night and try to just do things quietly. The idea was what their prey didn't know won't hurt them, but their methods weren't really foolproof and created problems. Especially if a man or woman was married or in a relationship. No harm was intended, it was just a matter of survival.
The "hunger" can get ravenous, so to speak, and they can become less inhibited in how they obtain their food. Not violent, just desperate like anyone else would be if they were starving. If they haven't eaten for a while, they start to suffer from withdrawals and begin to age at a normal rate.
Since then, designated groups were established where they were briefed on the requirements of Incubi and Succubi and it creates a lot less problems now. Plus they get to enjoy it more instead of feeling like they're being preyed upon. One male is enough to sustain a Succubus, but for an Incubus multiple females are required since menstrual cycles are less frequent.
Word of these practices had gotten around to underground groups and you hear about wannabes trying to emulate it, or Satanists who sacrifice people so they can drink their blood, but they're all doing it wrong. They must have overheard something without getting the full picture and just thought "blood" by itself instead of "menstrual blood", and have no clue as to the purpose of the sexual practices other than gratification.
There's this story I know of this one Incubus that had been kept hidden for a long time. It's unknown how long exactly, but I can tell you the reason for the lack of clarity is because it started back before records were kept as "meticulously" as they are now.
Basically he was kept as an infant for an extraordinarily long period of time. The menstrual blood seemed to keep him from growing up. From what I know, he hated it because as soon as his mental faculties would start to improve, the menstrual blood would revert him all over again. He used to try and hide it, but they would catch on seeing him start doing more complex activities.
It didn't involve any weird sexual stuff either. They would just go in another room to collect the blood, then mix it in some orange juice or something and he'd drink it real quick. They could get a few women to spit in a cup and he'd get his enzymes that way.
What they would do is go from place to place assuming identities. It was a lot easier before birth certificates and other identification documents. They basically just had to give a name and that was it. They would stick around for a couple years or so, then after a while would have to move on because people would get suspicious that he wasn't growing like a normal boy.
After a while as society became more complex, assuming identities became more difficult. They used to use that trick where you go through records to find an infant that died, then get the birth certificate and social security number that way. Once that method was closed off, that would be the "signal" for him to be able to age normally from that point and stay with the current identity.
Another reason for their concealment is due to their heightened mental state, stem cell regenerative ability, and overall improved performance, they would make effective soldiers for governments. The Succubi would also sometimes be sexually abused and their abusers didn't see anything wrong with it because they just thought they were "feeding" them.
They've been all over the galaxy and it seems like wherever they go, someone wants to use them for their own purposes. Whenever they resist, they tend to get hunted down and wiped out. It's something to the effect of "if we can't have you, nobody can". It's also likely due to fear of retaliation.
Incubi and Succubi are a lot more rare now. Something like an endangered species of the galactic variety.
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